Archive for February, 2012

Memories: “Forever is never forever.”

I have been struggling with memories lately. Avoiding them while awake has only forced them to haunt me while asleep. With persisting nightmares night in, night out, I longed for uninterrupted sleep. I thought I am through with haunting memories; I thought I found inner peace. It appears as though I have not, and it all comes back to me – throbbing. Suffocating my airways and fogging my sight. Then this comes along. And it all makes sense again, even just for a little while. I found peace, even just for a little while.

Memories by Ólafur Arnalds

“Memories. Memories blur into dreams. Light bleeds into truth. Everything unforgiven; everything becoming hallow. Loneliness consumes and there is no way back. The places you played; the places you called home; the people you thought you loved, all of them, reduced to a memory of another life. A life you never lived. All the yesterdays that came from tomorrow, all the tomorrows that never came from yesterday. A new beginning because forever is never forever.”

So I smile knowing that today’s worries will not make it tomorrow, because forever is never forever.

In memory of those who died during the Hama Massacre.

In memory of those who died during the Hama Massacre. It saddens me to share a birthday with such a dreaded event that took away thousands of my people’s lives. Today, I celebrate courage and honor-ship of my people. Today is a reason to rise in pride, not wallow in tears.  

Listen to: No audio. To the sound of martyrs, for they whisper.

You, who stole my country’s bread,
You, who killed my people,
Take me instead,
For you I have scarified my neck,
You, who tore down my signs,
You, who filled my land with mines,
Come to me,
Endanger me,
Leave them and just come,

You, who laughs at the blood streams of martyrs,
You, who dismantles the bodies of the dead,
Let them rest in peace and just come,
Rip my heart instead,
Tear down my dreams and rest,
You, who stole my country in bed,
Would you like some tea with that?
Perhaps a lemon squeeze in jest,

You, who promised and lied,
Will you ever leave undone?
You, who thousands at his own hands died,
You never seem to come,
Yet behind children caskets you hide,

You, whose heart in stone is engraved,
Would you please not disturb their shallow graves?
Come if you choose to be late,
Control whoever you may,
Untouchable is fate.

On your knees, yet you stand,
posing behind a brave man,
Crimson stained hands,
Nationless land,
Must you not understand?

You have not come,
And I shall not bow,
As long as I live,
As ever as I am dead,
I will not bow
I will not bow